This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Im part way to drunk.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
