Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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