I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize