New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
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