i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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