What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
We need to rekindle our bromance
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Randomize
