Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
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