I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
