the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize