Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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