At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
