A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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