I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize