lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
