discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
How does one acquire holy water?
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Randomize
