The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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