white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize