dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Someone signed my nipple.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
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