Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize