I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
