The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
