do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize