so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
