omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize
