im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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