i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
