I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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