yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
