wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
