I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Randomize
