Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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