Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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