I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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