How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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