the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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