Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
