I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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