I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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