what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Randomize
