Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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