Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
