Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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