ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
