paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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