My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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