He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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