Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
