why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
you told grandpa to call you daddy
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Randomize