The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I went to an adult Halloween party last night dressed as Mrs. Doubtfire, but I woke up on a stranger's couch surrounded by sleeping children in karate gi's. And I accidentally flushed my granny wig mid-puke, so if they wake up I'm gonna have to convince them that I'm just a weird older man and not a terrible cross dresser.
How did you come to this point in your life?
Good bartenders.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize