coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
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